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Today's Thought - April
April 1
I shall tell you a great secret, my friend. Do not wait for the last judgment. It takes place every day. --Albert Camus We live our program in one day portions - and our actions today have immediate consequences. For instance, if we listen to a brother or a sister in the program, we may be enriched and the other person strengthened for today's challenge. We don't have to confront every temptation of life on this day - only the portion we can handle. Our old insanity would have us predict the entire story of our future from today's limited viewpoint. But our spiritual orientation guides us to restrain ourselves. We simply live in this moment. The rewards of recovery are granted every day. We begin with the gift of a new day and new possibilities. We now have relationships that sustain us through difficulty and give us reason to celebrate. We have a new feeling of self respect and hope. I am grateful for the rewards of each day in my spiritual awakening. You are reading from the book: Touchstones by Anonymous |
April 2
The Fox and the Cat One day a fox and a cat were discussing the methods they used to avoid their enemies. "I have many clever ways to escape," bragged the fox. "I only have one," replied the cat. Just then they heard a pack of hounds headed their way. The cat immediately scampered up a nearby tree. But the fox froze. He thought about digging a hole. He considered that he could jump into a pond and swim to safety. He figured that he was so quick on his feet that he could create a very confusing trail for the hounds to follow. As the fox continued his internal debate, he remained immobilized. So the hounds easily caught him. The Moral of the story: Better to have one safe way than a hundred unproven ones. How many times in the past did you strive to convince yourself that you did not have a problem? And yet no amount of excuses saved you from your problem. The program is your only safe way to escape from the ravages caused by addiction. Today I will be like the cat, which used one sure way to ensure safety. You are reading from the book: Morning Light by Amy E. Dean |
April 3
When angry, count to ten before you speak; if very angry, a hundred. --Thomas Jefferson Sometimes we just want to yell. Maybe a family member or a friend messed up, and we want to "set them straight." Start counting. Maybe we got chewed out at work and we want "to get even." Start counting. We can get drunk on anger. We may feel powerful when we "set someone straight." But like an alcohol high, an anger high lasts only a short time and can hurt others. We must control our anger. This is why we count. Cool down. Think out what you need or want to say. Use words that you'll not be ashamed of later. Learning how to respect others when we're angry is a sign of recovery. Prayer for the Day Higher Power, teach me to respect others when I'm angry. Action for the Day Today, when I feel angry I'll count. I'll work at not controlling others with my anger. You are reading from the book: Keep It Simple by Anonymous |
April 4
An Unfolding Story Our lives are like a story told one day at a time. Some of our story has been revealed; much remains. Yet life is not like a book in which you can skip ahead; life unfolds one day at a time. Though it may be hard right now, let's not wish any of it away but live each day fully. We are the only ones who can write our story. Am I fully present in my life today? Thought for the Day Change is not visible on a daily basis but may be revealed when I am not looking. You are reading from the book: A Restful Mind by Mark Allen Zabawa |
April 5
See who you are. Own who you are. Be who you are. Don't apologize. -- Jerry K. At some point in our recovery, we need to admit to ourselves and others who we really are. Looking inside and pondering our shortcomings is not the most comfortable thing the program has asked us to do. In the past it's been more comfortable to deny them, to look the other way, to sweep the human error element under the rug. But the rewards are great. Once we own our shortcomings, once we tell them out loud to another person, we have taken full responsibility for ourselves - who we are, what we are - and how we have acted. Now we are closer to our Higher Power, who has accepted us all along. Now we can return to the spiritual support that is always available. When we admit who we are to ourselves and others, we are given the gift of self-acceptance and a sense of belonging to the human race. By opening ourselves this way, we enrich our relationships with our Higher Power, ourselves, and our fellow humans. These relationships bring a new sense of belonging and meaning to our lives. Today help me tell myself, my Higher Power, and at least one other person who I really am. You are reading from the book: Body, Mind, and Spirit by Anonymous |
April 6
Life is not life at all without delight. -- Coventry Patmore Newcomer I'm tired of following the same routines week after week, month after month. I've been thinking about taking a trip for a few days. I know, I know, you warned me about geographic changes. But I want to do something different. Sponsor Congratulations, I'm glad that you're planning to have some fun, and that you're not using program wisdom to beat yourself with. Change is good for us. It can help wake up and refresh our spirits, show us things we haven't seen before, give us a new perspective on our ordinary lives. We can travel thousands of miles or stay close to home, as long as we take the principles and habits of recovery with us. Wherever we are, we can read a piece of program literature, pray for help staying in recovery, or phone our sponsors. The loving guidance of our Higher Power goes with us. As we travel, it may be possible to attend meetings of our own Twelve Step fellowship or an open meeting of one of the many other Twelve Step programs. We can get listings ahead of time by making phone calls to our own program headquarters, and we can check local newspapers and phone directories when we arrive. Belonging to this fellowship is a little bit like having a membership in an international club; we can meet the locals, wherever we go, by attending a meeting. The faces may be different, but the program is the same. Today, I refresh my spirit by trying something unfamiliar. You are reading from the book: If You Want What We Have by Joan Larkin |
April 7
When all is said and done, willingness is everything. --Frank D. Most of us know very well that recovery doesn't happen, nor is there any positive growth, unless we are first of all willing. Sometimes we get confused over the difference between willing and wanting. We don't have to want, let alone enjoy, doing what needs to be done. Not wanting to do something is altogether different from not being willing to do it. As one recovering woman said, "Everything I ever let go of had claw marks all over it." The bottom line is that she did let go no matter how badly she wanted to hang on; she was willing. Think of the people in the program we most admire, those whose progress seems so speedy compared to ours. They may very well not enjoy going out to meetings. They may find it uncomfortable to meet with their sponsors or to say kind words when they really want to complain. They may wish they didn't have to make amends to certain people. But druthers aren't the point. The point is that they are willing to do what it takes. Today, I ask God to help me deepen my willingness to grow and to see the difference between what I want and what I will. You are reading from the book: Days of Healing, Days of Joy by Earnie Larsen and Carol Larsen Hegarty |
April 8
Surviving meant being born over and over. --Erica Jong We have decided to live. And each day we make the decision anew. Each time we call a friend, work a Step, or go to a meeting, we are renewing our contract with life. We are being reborn. Before coming to this program we died, emotionally and spiritually, many times. Some of us nearly died physically. But here we are, starting a new day, looking for guidance from one another. We are the survivors. And survival is there for the taking. We will have days when we struggle with our decision to live. We will want to throw in the towel. We will want to give in or give up. But we've learned from one another about choices. And the choice to survive, knowing we never have to do it alone, gets easier with time. I am one of the survivors. Today is my day for celebration. You are reading from the book: Each Day a New Beginning by Karen Casey |
April 9
We need to listen to one another. --Chaim Potok Listening is an important skill to cultivate. We need to sit in our healing circles and lovingly listen and learn from each other. We are each other's teachers. Our sponsors listen to our troubles, and we listen to their suggestions. We pray to our Higher Power and then meditate, a form of listening, from which we develop conscious contact with our Higher Power. Listening is one of the gifts we give to each other. Listening is also one of the gifts we give to ourselves. As we listen to others and learn from them, we stop thinking we are the center of the universe. Listening to others - to truly hear what they say, to learn from them - helps keep our egos in check. We should frequently ask ourselves, "Am I practicing the skills of active listening?" Prayer for the Day Higher Power, today I pray that I may open myself up to hearing Your voice in the words of others. Allow me to see the people around me as teachers. Help me stay open to being taught. Today's Action Today I will listen. I will notice those times when I stop listening and start judging. I will bring myself back into listening mode. Today I will be a learner. You are reading from the book: God Grant Me... by Anonymous |
April 10
Daily, we determine our priorities. Priorities are not merely something we establish once a year, once a month, or even once a week. Our priorities are visible in the myriad decisions we make and actions we take each day. Being closely in touch with our inner selves and our Higher Power helps assure that our priorities reflect our genuine needs and desires. When we are securely centered, we will not be unduly influenced by other people but will know what is truly important to us and necessary for our health and well being. We set our priorities when we do our grocery shopping and plan our meals. We set them when we choose between playing tennis or reading a book or going to see a friend. We set them when we decide how to respond to a negative comment from a co-worker. Our daily priorities reflect who we are and determine what we are becoming. Let's set them with care. Today, may I put first things first. You are reading from the book: Inner Harvest by Elisabeth L. |
April 11
It is the soul's duty to be loyal to its own desires. --Rebecca West Our soul's pure desires, those that harm no one else, are really invitations from God for us to try new activities, to perhaps move along unfamiliar corridors, or tackle challenges that will carry us closer to our destiny. Fulfilling our desires can expand our knowledge of life, but even more, it can strengthen our trust in our Higher Power. Perhaps our primary goal is to trust more in our Higher Power's presence, loving guidance, and commitment to our growth. Our Higher Power is our most treasured friend and teacher, our most significant other. We'll never be led astray with the guidance offered us for fulfilling our purest desires. I will ask God for direction and attune myself to my innermost desires today. You are reading from the book: 52 Weeks of Conscious Contact by Melody Beattie |
April 12
Reflection for the Day The first psychiatrist to recognize the work of Alcoholics Anonymous, Dr. Harry Tiebout, used many concepts of the Program in his own practice. Over many years, the doctor's study of the "conversion experience" led him to see, first, that it is the act of surrender which initiates the switch from negative to positive; second, that the positive phase is really a state of surrender which follows the act of surrender; and third, that the state of surrender, if maintained, supplies an emotional tone to all thinking and feeling that insures healthy adjustment. Am I living in a constant state of surrender? Today I Pray May I understand that I do not have to "unlearn" my respect for "self-reliance," that trait of character, which I heard praised so often from the time I was a tiny child. Only my understanding of the word must change. For as I come to know that "self" is part of God, that I am nothing except in God's Being, there is no quarrel between self-reliance and God-reliance. May I rely upon that self, which is God's. Today I Will Remember Not part-god, but part of God. You are reading from the book: A Day at a Time (Softcover) by Anonymous |
April 13
The world is a wheel always turning. Those who are high go down low, and those who've been low go up higher. --Anzia Yezierska Everything changes. Nothing stays the same. And letting go of the way things are, anticipating instead what they might become, frees us to live each moment more fully. Time marches on, and our destiny marches with it. There is purpose in how our lives unfold; the ups and downs serve our growth. We must neither resent the doldrums nor savor too long the elation. Giving too much attention to either state interferes with our awareness of the present. And the present has come to teach us. We must move with time. We must focus our attention on the moment and accept whatever feelings each experience elicits. Emotional maturity is accepting our feelings and letting them go and facing instead the next moment with fresh receptivity. Our lessons are many, and they accompany the lows as well as the highs. We can be grateful for both. The program has taught us freedom from lingering lows. It has given us the tools to move confidently forward, trusting that all is well. Nothing lasts forever, and within each struggle is the opportunity for real growth. The highs will pass away, just as will the lows. They visit us purposefully. I will give them their freedom and find mine as well. You are reading from the book: Each Day a New Beginning by Karen Casey |
April 14
Self-esteem comes from honoring your healing journey My life is not perfect. I make a lot of mistakes. Sometimes, I stumble and fall. I am a work in progress. And when I remember that simple fact, I am better for the experience. It's easy to start on a path of change and get so busy doing what we need to do that we forget to stop, breathe, and acknowledge the effort we've already made. We forget to honor our own healing journey. There are times when I have to be reminded to do for myself what I do for others. The other day, a friend caught me denigrating the work I put into a project because it wasn't done perfectly. When she asked how it was coming along, I said, "I can't seem to get it down perfectly. It's horrible." I then spent ten minutes - which was as long as she could tolerate my ranting - downplaying the work I had put into the project so far. She couldn't believe she was listening to me. "You could be one of your own clients," she said. And how right she was. I needed to be coached at that moment in time. And after our conversation, I called my coach. Healing is hard work. It takes great effort to stay on a path that leads to purposeful self-discovery. It takes energy - persistent energy - to be an active participant in the creation of our lives. A healing path requires having the courage to shine a light or allow a light to shine on parts of ourselves that we'd rather keep private. It means having the courage to see the work that still needs to be done. Honoring our healing journey invites us to appreciate the effort that has been made. It's important to heal and to honor the work done. You are reading from the book: 52 Weeks of Esteemable Acts by Francine Ward |
April 15
Reflection for the Day If I am troubled, worried, exasperated or frustrated, do I tend to rationalize the situation and lay the blame on someone else? When I am in such a state, is my conversation punctuated with, "He did." "She said." "They did."? Or can I honestly admit that perhaps I'm at fault. My peace of mind depends on overcoming my negative attitudes and tendency toward rationalization. Will I try, day by day, to be rigorously honest with myself? Today I Pray May I catch myself as I talk in the third person, "He did..." or "They promised..." or "She said she would..." and listen for the blaming that has become such a pattern for me and preserves delusion. May I do a turnabout and face myself instead. Today I Will Remember Honesty is the only policy. You are reading from the book: A Day at a Time (Softcover) by Anonymous |
April 16
Asking for help is the first step to healthy living. By admitting to our friends that we don't know what we should do about the many confusing, sometimes scary circumstances in our lives, we open the door for our Higher Power to reach us. That's often the way help comes to us. At times we'll open a book and an inspiring passage will jump out, or we'll wake up feeling as if God has answered us in our dreams. But more frequently and vividly, our help is in the gentle words of a friend. Many of us postponed getting help because we dreaded asking for it. We thought that asking for help would make us look weak and uninteresting. We so wanted to be liked and admired that we pretended all was well, while in reality all was awful. It's a profound relief to share our burdens with other people. And the best part is, we'll get needed guidance. I won't be afraid to cry "help" today. My Higher Power can help only if I'm open to it. You are reading from the book: A Life of My Own by Karen Casey |
April 17
I Am Who I Am Sometimes we want to be someone else – anyone but who we are. We want to be someone who feels more free and at peace. We want to be someone who doesn't have to take medications day after day. We want to be free of the pain and loneliness our illness has brought us. But whether we get what we want or not, what we need is to accept ourselves, our illness, a desire to become well, and the guidance of our Higher Power. Today, do I accept myself, my illness, and the guidance of my Higher Power? Do I commit myself to recovery? Thought for the Day When I look within, I will discover that accepting myself and being myself are far more fulfilling that expected. You are reading from the book: A Restful Mind by Mark Allen Zabawa |
April 18
Watching a child acquire language, I realize, again, that naming things demystifies them. --Mary Casey Sharing with another our fears of starting a new job, ending a relationship, getting into therapy, or even joining a social club will help us keep the fear in perspective. Fears that go undiscussed have a way of growing and overtaking our lives. In time we find that because of our shame about being afraid, we have isolated ourselves from the very people who can help us. All of us are afraid some of the time. Our fears, however, can be managed if we use the tools found in the fellowship. Sponsors, friends, and meetings are the channels for our release from fear. Naming the fear loosens its hold on us. And equally important, we discover that others understand our fear, for they have experienced something very similar. We are not unique. That knowledge makes it easier to reveal another fear, another time. Perhaps the best gift I can give someone is talking about something I fear. Naming the fear will help me. Sharing it will help us both because of the bond we will feel. You are reading from the book: A Woman's Spirit by Karen Casey |
April 19
We don't receive wisdom; we must discover it for ourselves after a journey that no one can take for us or spare us... --Marcel Proust Many of us have known people new to recovery who enter a Twelve Step program only to encounter an enormous crisis or difficulty. It's tempting at that point to question the mercurial nature of life, which sometimes inflicts blows when someone is already down. Difficulties do serve a purpose, though. It's often in such moments of struggle that people become aware of the reality of their life and begin to make difficult choices. It's also then that the fellowship of our recovery group shines, offering its collective experience, strength and hope to the addict in need. Many of us have known someone who refused or was unable to hear the message being offered at our meeting. It takes wisdom, patience, and detachment to know when to reach out to someone, and how far to go. The respect we feel for that person's recovery process as well as the faith we have in our Higher Power and the Twelve Step program can help us do our part and then let go. Life is a learning experience. I can learn the lesson of my life, but not someone else's. You are reading from the book: Answers in the Heart by Anonymous |
April 20
What is strength without a double share of wisdom? Vast, unwieldy, burdensome proudly secure, yet liable to fall. --John Milton What do we mean when we say someone is strong? That they have big muscles? Can endure anything without getting tired, let alone giving up? Do strong people never bend? Never break? Some of us are afraid to show weakness of any kind. We take our supposed strength as the central fact of our lives. Over time, we may even come to think of ourselves as indestructible. We imagine that everything - people, places, and things - can be pounded into place if we come on with enough force. One man at a meeting shared that he had been confined to a hospital bed after a serious heart attack. Since he had been forbidden exertion of any kind, he said he made himself get out of bed, walk across the room, and pick up a scrap of paper from the floor. Just to prove that he could, he said. Many of us are more like this man than we care to admit. May we, like him, become willing to accept our strength as our weakness, if that is the case. Today, let me accept my very real and human limitations. You are reading from the book: Days of Healing, Days of Joy by Earnie Larsen and Carol Larsen Hegarty |
April 21
Living new lives If we thank our Higher Power each day for the problems in our lives, we will find that we can live and cope with them. And if it is our Higher Power's will, our problems will be transformed in ways we cannot comprehend. We don't fully understand our lives. If we become willing to let our Higher Power handle each situation in its way, we will see that we are living ourselves into new ways of being. We will experience a freedom and joy that we could not have understood in our old ways of thinking and being. We cannot think ourselves into a better life; we must live each day into better thinking. Am I living myself into a new life? Higher Power, I am grateful for the problems in my life; they help me change myself into a new being. You are reading from the book: Day by Day - Second Edition by Anonymous |
April 22
Possibilities and miracles are one and the same. --Anonymous Many of us have seen happiness as a goal we couldn't find. When we were children, we were taught that "life is a hard row to hoe." We carried that over into our adult lives. Seize the day - We let too many of our days just slide by. None of those hours can be replaced. Why worry over past failures if there is a victory to win? Why keep thinking about our faults when we could be practicing virtues instead? Seize the day - Hold each moment tight and look at each one with wide-open eyes and mind. They are our lives, special to each of us. The moments pass swiftly into memory. Let those memories be good ones, filled with joys large and small. Yesterday's unhappiness can't be changed, but today's happiness is my own responsibility. You are reading from the book: Easy Does It by Anonymous |
April 23
Each day is a new start. Each moment is a beginning. We do not have to wait until Monday to get back on the program or clean a closet or tackle a difficult report. We do not have to wait until tomorrow morning, either. Now is the moment to stop, to make a phone call, to begin whatever project we have been putting off. There is no way we can change what we did five minutes ago, nor can we predict what will happen half an hour from now. We can only deal with now. By doing what needs to be done right now, we make the most of each present moment. As long as we are alive, we are always free to begin again. Instead of following an old, worn out habit, make a fresh start this moment on the rest of your life. Give me grace, Lord, to begin again. You are reading from the book: Food for Thought by Elisabeth L. |
April 24
My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me. --Henry Ford To be a friend involves risk. Friends confront each other when it's needed, but they do it out of love and with compassion. All of us need a friend who will tell us when we are acting out of line, when we are "not able to see the forest for the trees." Friends are there for us in the struggles – rooting us on, maybe teasing us a bit, helping us get past the difficulties and eventually helping us find the gift embedded in them. Friends risk upsetting us, if it means we may become better people. We need to be grateful for these people. Theirs is not always an easy job. Many of us have big egos; we don't want to be told that we are wrong. However, friends keep seeing the best in us, even when we aren't acting our best. Theirs will be the faces we see when we look back at our lives, especially at the times of crisis and challenge. Prayer for the Day Higher Power, help me be a friend, and help me be grateful for my friends. Today's Action Today I will work to bring out the best in those around me, even if that means saying the hard things. If I must confront someone, I will only do it if I can do it with love and compassion. You are reading from the book: God Grant Me... by Anonymous |
April 25
Trust An attitude of helpful expectancy can serve me very well today. My Higher Power has my day in His hands. Whatever happens, it will go most smoothly, and I will feel best about myself, if I am open to what the day brings, and at peace with whatever it holds for me. I can give my best if I do not get bogged down in hurt, anger, and resentment. Instead, I'll try to trust in my Higher Power. I'll have faith that good will come my way. Help me today to be flexible and willing in my work. . . Help me to learn trust in a new way. You are reading from the book: Help for Helpers by Anonymous |
April 26
I want to change things. I want to see things happen. I don't want just to talk about them. --John Kenneth Galbraith Newcomer I feel as if I should be doing so much more than just staying in recovery and going to meetings. And yet, when I have free time, I'm not accomplishing much these days. I go to a meeting and then to coffee – "the meeting after the meeting," I've heard it called – and I get home and feel too tired to do any more. When I have a big block of time, I don't know how to use it. I feel confused and discouraged. Sponsor This point in recovery is a time to be especially gentle with ourselves. When we look back at how we were feeling and what we were doing just before we entered recovery, we can see that "just staying in recovery and going to meetings" is a major change. To be free from our addictive behavior, to keep a commitment to a program of recovery – this is nothing short of a total revolution in our lives. We have made a commitment to live, not to punish ourselves for not doing it faster and more perfectly. "The meeting after the meeting" is not a waste of time. It's important to get to know our peers in recovery. We can learn from one another, support one another. The changes we're experiencing are mirrored back to us by others who are undergoing similar transformations. It gives us experience, too, at being with people without the "help" of our addictive substance or behavior. We don't have to worry about wasting time in early recovery. It is a miracle that we can simply be. Today, I let myself be. You are reading from the book: If You Want What We Have by Joan Larkin |
April 27
The person who is bored in the modern world shows that he is in no full sense a member of it. --Brand Blanshard Enthusiasm doesn't just happen to us. It's an attitude that is either fostered or hindered by our decisions about what we'll bring to our experiences from the most mundane to the momentous. This is true either throughout the day at hand or throughout our life. Deciding to be enthusiastic for a project comes easily when we've made up our mind to simply enjoy being alive. Gratitude for the many blessings that recovery has brought even further heightens our enthusiasm for living. We all know people who are bored with their jobs, who withdraw from social involvement. Most of these people have lost touch with their fundamental sense of gratitude for what life has given them. The power to enjoy life fully, to bring enthusiasm to whatever we do, is within our grasp. In fact, it's within our own mind. I'll be as enthusiastic as I am grateful today. You are reading from the book: In God's Care by Karen Casey |
April 28
You can feel only your own feelings, not another person's. Having empathy for those we love, and being able to share their joys and sorrows, is part of our nature as warm, caring human beings. Taken to an extreme, however, too much empathy can mean that we lose our boundaries as emotionally separate individuals. When that happens, nobody wins. We're responsible for our own feelings. If we're too deeply involved in another person's emotional state, we may not be truly aware of our own feelings. If we take on someone else's response to a situation, we lose our own in the process. In any situation, particularly one that is highly charged with negative emotions, we need to maintain a sense of self. If we allow ourselves to be swept up in the anger, fear, grief, or despair of someone close to us, we become less capable of giving help and support. Emotional maturity is one of the goals of recovery. We progress toward it as we differentiate how we feel from how another person appears to feel. I can respect the feelings of others without making them my own. You are reading from the book: Inner Harvest by Elisabeth L. |
April 29
Moving fast is not necessarily the same thing as going somewhere. ***** If you are waiting for your ship to come in - you may have already missed the boat. ***** Courage is fear that has said its prayers. ***** Faith is our greatest gift. Sharing it with others is our greatest responsibility. ***** The first step in overcoming mistakes is to admit to them. ***** The best way to multiply happiness is to divide it. ***** Try the program for 90 days. If not satisfied we will be glad to refund your misery. You are reading from the book: Keep Coming Back Gift Book by Meiji Stewart |
April 30
Lying to ourselves is more deeply ingrained than lying to others. --Fyodor Dostoevsky The primary requirement for our recovery is honesty. In order to grow in honesty we first needed to see how we had lied to others and to ourselves. This was not as easy as it first appeared. Our lies to ourselves kept us so fully in the dark that we did not know we were lying. We sometimes told "sincere" lies because we honestly did not distinguish the truth within ourselves. For so long we had preferred dishonest rationalizations, and we had come to believe them. The spiritual life of this program is based upon experience. What we feel, what we see and hear, is what we know. When we simplify our lives and base the truth upon our experiences, we slowly cleanse ourselves of the lies we told ourselves. With this kind of honesty comes an inner peace with ourselves in which we can say, "I know myself." Today, I will accept my experience as a simple message of truth. You are reading from the book: Touchstones by Anonymous |
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